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- Ed Howard - Nebraska StatePaper.com
Nebraska StatePaper.com News Update (2006)
- Read Daily News Updates from Ed Howard, Editor of Nebraska StatePaper.com
- Number of posts: 163
- Date created: Apr 11, 2006
- Updated: Dec 28, 2006
- Permanent link to this blog
Endangering the Polar Bears
posted: Dec 28, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Even the government is finally recognizing that bad environmental business is endangering the polar bears. What does that tell you? Those bears are smarter than bureaucrats, tougher than badgers and they survive in a climate colder than Richard Perle's heart. Let's hope that humankind doesn't screw up the chance to prevent what could be among the most shameful of its environmental disasters.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
President Gerald R. Ford
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 27, 2006) President Gerald R. Ford deserves to be remembered as an honorable man. When he first pardoned Richard M. Nixon, sparing the latter the possible embarrassment of jail, the political roof fell in on Ford. He said the nation's long national nightmare was over. Over the decades, increasing numbers of critics concluded that he was right to spare the nation a Nixon trial, and whatever might come after. His decision remains a matter of contention. Although born in Omaha, Ford was never especially popular with the GOP electorate. In 1976, he was defeated in the state's Republican primary by Ronald Reagan. Ford went on to be defeated in the general election by Jimmy Carter. He had spent just 29 months in the White House, and had never been elected vice president or president.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Family Christmas
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 26, 2006) Our hope is that your Christmas was joyous, that your Hanukkah was the same, and that none of those close to you infected family and friends with a cold. Or anything. We were dumbstruck, there's no other word for it, by the Christmas gifts that came our way from "the kids." Beautiful things and books and wonderful photograph albums from their adventures in Europe. Our age showed when we surveyed the treasure - and contemplated the thoughtfulness. The best we could do, initially: "Ohhhh, wow!" It also gave rise to one change in what has been more than less a tradition for "the dad." Out went the holiday goodbye that concluded with "Call if you need anything." The new refrain? "Thank you for a wonderful Christmas. We'll call if we need anything!"
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
StatePaper.com Quoted by Rush Limbaugh
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 22, 2006) For those of you who asked - and for those who did not - it is true. Rush Limbaugh quoted and commented favorably Thursday on a column that appeared in StatePaper.com. Some conservative readers who have called us everything but a child of God should thus be further convinced that this is the season of miracles. Either that, or that Limbaugh has been mixing egg nog with his medication.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Ruling on Banning "issue ads"
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 21, 2006) A federal appeals court in D.C. just ruled that Congress cannot ban those so-called "issue ads" that appear on television during peak election periods. Those are the advertisements that interest groups put on the air - purporting not to endorse any candidate - while nonetheless making it clear that one person on the ballot is right-minded about things; and sometimes suggesting that the other is a putz. We have seen them in Nebraska, and so has everyone else in the country. The ones that really sting will often draw complaints from the intended target, who will blame the opponent. The opponent, however, notes that his/her campaign had no prior knowledge of the ad. Question: Why can't we all just slap each other in the mouth - and be honest about it?
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Driving in Snow and Ice
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
( December 20, 2006) We understand that the work of the world has to get done, regardless of weather. Snow and ice come with the territory. We would nonetheless suggest that when roads are dangerous, give a thought to whether you really need to drive in such weather. Many of us have stood on a cold street, next to a dented fender, or worse, and asked ourselves why we thought it was so important to go out, and why this or that errand couldn't wait. What are the odds something bad will happen to you? Not much. You'll probably be fine. But if necessity doesn't require getting onto roads when they genuinely are treacherous - why bother?
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Communist Dictators
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 19, 2006) There’s no telling when Fidel will leave this earth for whatever it is that communist dictators expect next. However, if anyone suggests that we just pop on down to Cuba to spread a little democracy – and “be greeted as liberators” – we need to put that dummy on a slow boat to China. (We owe billions to the Chinese, and they have nukes, so we aren’t likely to “set them free” any time soon.)
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Congratulations to NU Volleyball Team
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 18, 2006) A couple of things for Monday. First, our very best wishes and congratulations to the NU volleyball team. What a season. What discipline and dedication. What a deal. Good on you, ladies!
Our last word - actually, the words of others - on the physical risk to Barack Obama, a black man interested in a bid for the presidency. Find it here.
http://www.salon.com/politics/war_room/2006/12/15/obama/index.html
Emails to the editor are welcome.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
United States Not Likely to Elect Woman President
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 15, 2006) We should have opened yesterday's column with the words "Sad to say." The piece suggested the United States was not likely to elect a woman to the presidency, and even less likely to do so if the candidate were Senator Hillary Clinton. We offered a similar view concerning a potential presidential campaign by Senator Barack Obama. It was also suggested that Obama would be at risk of physical danger because he is not white. Among responses from readers were two of particular interest. One called the editor a Nazi. The other bemoaned the "right wing" views perceived to be reflected in the column. Most of those w***sponded - possibly more familiar with this space - understood the intended context of the analysis. A few others apparently thought it suggested that we were "telling off" Clinton and Obama - or something. The column was intended to comment on the perceived mindset of too much of the American electorate. We stand by it. One writer said it was "preposterous" to think Obama might be targeted for harm, on the basis of race, if he were on a national ticket. The view from here: It is not cynical to think the senator from Illinois would face such a risk; it is naive to think such would not be true.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama's Chances of Carrying Nebraska
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 13, 2006) Neither Hillary Clinton nor Barack Obama need to worry about how they might fare in Nebraska if they appear on the 2008 presidential ballot, together or separately. Democrats do not carry Nebraska in presidential races. Our thoughts about the Clinton-Obama political buzz have more to do with the overall national mindset. Call us cynical - we have been called worse - but our deep feeling is that the United States will not send a woman, especially not a Democrat and most especially not Hillary Clinton, to the president's office. We would say the same of any black candidate for president, and add the belief that he would be at high risk of deadly assault.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Illegal Workers
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 14, 2006) No plan to deal with the issue of workers w***e in the U.S. illegally is going to be popular. It is and will be political dynamite. No matter what is done - if any program actually comes out of Congress - some politicians are going to be targeted by angry constituents. Such is the case in Nebraska, as much as anywhere else in the country. The federal government is so politically timorous and sniveling that it is afraid to actually govern when the going gets tough - unless the demand for action comes from the well-heeled interests that actually have the power to decide the nation's course.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Progress Comes With a Price
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 12, 2006) Keep things in perspective. Progress comes with a price. Take the issue of gub-ment dee-reg-uh-lay-shun. It has been all the rage since the 1980s. Tens of millions of dollars in campaign contributions from many of the nation’s largest industries testify to its continuing popularity. Consider federal food inspections of all kinds. The incidents of such intrusive governmental meddling in some areas have been reduced from tens of thousands annually to fewer than 4,000. It’s a thing for free-market absolutists to celebrate. Preferably over a six-course meal at a Taco Bell in New Jersey.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Dilemma Associated with the Fireplace
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 11, 2006) There is a dilemma associated with the fireplace. If you have a proposed solution, let us know. The couches around the good old wood burner are greatly favored furniture at our place. Settle in with the ol' laptop and a bunch of work. Or a book. Appropriate seasonal music. Coffee. Fred the pacifist shar-pei snores and schnorfles. Even the cat shuts up for awhile. Amid this much-appreciated setting ... we fall asleep. Not sometimes. Every time. The amount of work accomplished before the cozy nodding off varies - but not by much. It can happen so fast that sometimes a fellow will wake up in a sitting position with a bowl of stew still in hand - and one dares not warm it up. The cat is notorious for stealthy initiatives as a hunter-gatherer. She hunts for your plate, gathers what she wants, and disappears at the first sign of one's awakening. You know when it has happened because Fred will be sitting in front of you, a sleepy eyed sentry, with a "Wheerre's mine?" look on his face.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Incident on Airlines Flight Story Joke or Real Deal?
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 08, 2006) It is impossible to predict what will get the most reaction from y'all. Lots of e-mail has come in asking if the story related in yesterday's column was a joke, or the real deal. What? Some of you think we would make up a story like that? The incident occurred on an American Airlines flight early Monday. In case anyone still thinks we're kidding, try this:
http://www.wbir.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=40210
Have a good weekend!
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Poor Woman, Beset by Flatulence, on an Airliner
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 07, 2006) There sat this poor woman, beset by flatulence, on an airliner. What to do? Although nature apparently took a silent course, the odiferous evidence of the situation was nonetheless embarrassing. Cool thinking was needed. In high school, we got some advice from a friend concerning appropriate tactics if such a problem arose while in one’s car, with a date. “Honk the horn so they don’t hear it, then light a match so they don’t smell it!” It obviously required good timing. Most fellows thought the more dependable thing was to gun the engine, pop the clutch and scream “Hallelujah!!!” while laying 40 feet of rubber. Of course, this only worked if your ride could burn a lot of rubber. Now, back to this lady on the plane, apparently sitting on more natural gas than Kansas. So, she went for the “light a match” strategy. It apparently worked until passengers began to smell burned matches, or something. The pilot was informed. The plane made an emergency landing. The lady was interrogated. She explained. The plane resumed its flight, without her. All ended well. But thank gawd she didn’t have a horn.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Cost of State Medicaid
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 06, 2006) There are reports, entirely legitimate, that the costs to the state of Medicaid are not growing quite as fast as previously recorded. That's good. It's also good not to get excited about it. The same is true with the increased costs of medical care for prison inmates - that's prison, not necessarily county jails. The economy is not growing in any great measure so far as the working class goes - and no matter what any tax-break-seeking billionaire tells you, it's the working class that pays the freight. The fact is that Nebraska - and the nation - have yet to find out what "tough decisions" really means.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Lincoln Ordinance Cracks Down on Graffiti
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 05, 2006) Lincoln has a new ordinance that cracks down on graffiti, via its victims. Local businesses will have only a certain amount of time to clean up their buildings if they get "tagged." If the business people don't do it, the city will - and submit a bill for its services. It is extremely difficult to catch a tagger in the act. And graffiti does need to be cleaned up quickly. We don't have an alternative solution to requiring locals to do the job. We certainly hope they can write off the cost of graffiti removal. The frustrating thing is that graffiti lends itself to serial offenses.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Big 12 Championship
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(December 01, 2006) The Big 12 championship will be decided in Kansas City tomorrow and, regardless of current forecasts, we hope it is colder than a banker's heart at game time, preferably with snow butt-deep on a draft horse. Such should even be the hope for an indoor stadium. (After all, hope never springs quite so eternal as in the hearts, and whatever is left of the minds of sports fans.) A miracle of the sports sort would not be required for the Huskers to secure victory - but any and every sort of thing that might distract the Sooners would be a help.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Complaining About the Cold Streak
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
( November 30, 2006) Some people have been complaining about the cold streak. Don't do it. Cold is okay. The bad thing is when rain and drizzle hit the road, then freeze. That's the stuff that leads to bumper cars - and trucks and pickups, and all manner of banged up people. Better to trudge through the cold than slide through the intersection, into the ditch, or over the river and into the woods.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Concerning Those Who Gripe During the Christmas Season
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(November 29, 2006) Concerning those who gripe and lean toward the litigious during the Christmas season.
"There are people who feel 'excluded' by Christian symbolism and are offended by the manger and the angels and the Child, but there have always been humorless, legalistic people. Complaint is an American art form, and in our time it has been raised to an operatic level. To which one can only say: Get a life. When you go to France, you don't expect a stack of buckwheat pancakes for breakfast or Le Monde to print box scores. You're in France. Now you're in America. It's a Christian culture. Work with it."
The above is quoted from the most recent column by Garrison Keillor. And he's on Public Radio!
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Guy Around and About North Platte Shot His Toe Off
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(November 28, 2006) The other day some guy around and about North Platte shot his toe off. In his pickup. Loaded rifle. Hunting. When a guy shoots his toe off, via having a loaded rifle or shotgun in a pickup, the world is better served if he is not alone. As long as he only shoots off his own extremities, it would be best if the pickup were filled to its legal capacity. That way, several other guys get to see what a foot looks like when a toe has been subtracted from it by a small piece of lead, traveling at high velocity. It can immediately and appreciably enhance his companions' belief in basic safety. You couldn't count the hunters who have seen wounded deer and ducks and antelope and pheasants and such, and never flinched. Let them gawk at mangled itty-bitty bits of big-toe burger, not to mention a ruined pair of field boots ... they still might not flinch. But they won't snuggle up to loaded guns in the cab of a pickup, either. (And if they do, any loss to the gene pool might well be negligible.)
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Columnist Robert Novak has often said "Always love your country. Never trust your government."
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(November 27, 2006) Columnist Robert Novak has often said "Always love your country. Never trust your government." Jefferson and others put it more eloquently, but not as directly or with greater clarity. In the global village, we would rewrite Novak second admonition just a tad: "Never trust any government." It is annoying to watch governments pretend that anyone with sense cannot see through them. What has become the American misadventure in Iraq is one example. Then, there is Vladimir Putin, the resident murderer-turned-politician who is president of Russia. Putin recently had a journalist murdered. A few days ago, a one-time Russian spy turned dissident was murdered in England, the victim of an exotic poisoning. Putin denied involvement in either case. The interesting thing: No one sharper than an infant's pacifier takes Putin's denial seriously. No one. Nor do they believe America's first concern in the Middle East is or was "enforcing" democracy. The American gambit is about oil and national security interests. The Putin murders are about p***ing off the top gangster in the Kremlin.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Democratic Majority in the House and Senate
posted: Dec 27, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(November 24, 2006) We note that several readers have commented in Feedbacks that the world will get better, or proceed directly to hell, what with the new Democratic majority in the House and Senate. Fergit, y'all. The majority in the Senate is hardly worth the name when it comes to enactment of legislation. There will be no outbreak of "liberal" laws going into the books. The thing that might occur: A much-needed increase in the minimum wage - accompanied by the usual cries of "This is the end of capitalism as we know it!" from some circles.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Questions to Ponder when Headed over the River and Down the Interstate to Grandma’s House
posted: Nov 22, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
(November 21, 2006) Questions to ponder when headed over the river and down the Interstate to grandma’s house – or anyplace else where you won’t have to cook on Thursday: Do you want to slap the next politician – Nebraskan or otherwise – who blabbers that faerie tale about “achieving affordable health care for Americans” but takes every dime the insurance industry and/or medical associations can come up with? If you saw the headline “Memo to O.J.- Kill yourself” would you think it a bit much, or merely reflective of top-of-the-line logic? Is it your imagination, or have turkey drumsticks lost their charm since you were a kid? If you haven’t hunted pheasants for many years, do you still hear the slide and lock of shotgun shells going into the breach of a .12 gauge pump? Are you middle-aged if you switch to a .20-gauge with an open choke, because you have no intention of taking long shorts anymore, anyway? Do you agree that the best pumpkin pie isn’t much different from the worst pumpkin pie – and that pumpkin pie is just an excuse to keep the nutmeg industry solvent? Why do you always get at least one cup of bottom-of-the-pot road-trip coffee that has been napalm-roasted and left in the carafe for 13 hours? Shouldn’t someone kick any adult under the table who orders a child to eat broccoli, or spinach, or sweet potatoes or beets on Thanksgiving?
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
O.J. Simpson Interview for Book “If I Did It.”
posted: Nov 22, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
H.L. Mencken was correct when he said: “No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American people.” It is possible, however, to risk losing a comparatively few dollars now and then. That is basically what Rupert Murdoch said today. Murdoch is the chairman of News Corp., the outfit that was planning to broadcast a television special with O.J. Simpson, based on his book “If I Did It.” It is hard to imagine that there is anyone who doesn’t know he did it. Murdoch had figured that Boobus Americanus would tune in by the tens of millions to watch the show. He was right! The thing was cancelled because criticism was sufficient to raise long-term concerns – about money. That’s all. If you want to see O.J.’s latest droppings on the murder of his wife and the poor soul she was with, hang on. A book/DVD deal will be available in no time.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Memo from the Fox News Boss
posted: Nov 22, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
What's the biggest surprise about the memo from the Fox News boss, telling his minions to find an angle for post-election news stories, putting the darkest spin possible on the Democrats' victories? From here, the biggest surprise is that anyone was surprised. Or appalled. What? There was someone with an IQ above post-digested horse feed who didn't recognize the Fox News agenda? The only problem we have with Fox is that it doesn't proclaim what it is - an organization that believes the news should be presented in the context it favors. That's all. We have long said that journalism should drop the cry of "objectivity" and devote itself to a realistic goal of "fairness." Fox wouldn't qualify for that either, but if it and other news outfits just came out of their philosophical closet, the people would be better served. By the way: How about Fox News putting up millions for the O.J. Simpson "interview" that it has been promoting? Huh? How about that?
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Rush Limbaugh
posted: Nov 22, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Give some points to Rush Limbaugh today. He is taking flak in some quarters for admitting - after the election - that the GOP had a butt-kicking coming. He said that he had, in many instances, gotten tired of carrying water "for those who don't deserve to have their water carried." Okay. His enormous audience, and probably the Republican Party, would obviously have been better served if he had spoken out a lot earlier. When Rush talks, people listen. Some of them cringe and some of them shout hallelujah - but people listen. His admission that he fronted for an unworthy bunch must be taken in context. Limbaugh never said the country would be well served by Democrats - a party he once malevolently and childishly and shamefully referred to as being treasonous. The thing is, the fact that RL at least told his minions that the GOP had gone astray has the potential for doing some good - at least until he falls back into the hackles and fangs mode. Any bets on how long it will take?
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Robert Frost
posted: Nov 22, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Robert Frost once heard a friend use the word "smalling" as a verb. Frost said that it wasn't a word. Couldn't be. They went to an appropriately authoritative dictionary. "Smalling" was there. The example of its use? A poem by Frost. With a little imagination and a lot of reputation, a fellow can contribute to the English language! Now, then. About yesterday's NewsUpdate column. We used the word untolled. Not "untold." The word was "untolled." The latter means "uncounted." It has yet to achieve popular use. Look: At least one dictionary defines toll as "An amount or extent of loss ..." See? So, the amount of e-mail we lost was "UNtolled," since the amount wasn't counted. Couldn't be. That's our innovative view of it. It is of no matter that the editors of some dictionaries disagree. They are in charge of dictionaries, not StatePaper.com
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Lost Emails
posted: Nov 22, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
At least we get the satisfaction of saying it happened on a Monday. Our favorite laptop suddenly became allergic to electricity the other day and has been assigned to the inactive list for the time being. We lost an untolled number of e-mail from you, beginning Monday afternoon. If you have the time, inclination and goodwill to resend whatever, we will gladly have a look.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Our 2006 Absolutely Favorite Comment
posted: Nov 22, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Our 2006 absolutely favorite comment of the accidentally overheard variety came our way at a grocery store in Lincoln on Saturday. A girl of perhaps 12 was with her (probably) mom. She began talking to another girl of about the same age while waiting to check out. Very close to verbatim: 'My brother's coming home in a couple months. I was worried he would go back, but now I'm pretty sure he'll stay [home] because the president and the other people are going to cooperate. Did you know that? It was on tv.'
From her lips to God's ear.
http://nebraska.statepaper.com
Did you vote?
posted: Nov 8, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Did you vote? We will reiterate previous election day thoughts. You know, there are lots of people and organizations that suggest and cajole and insist that every eligible voter get out there and vote. From this corner we would like to say: BALONEY! If you haven't paid attention to the campaigns and the ballot issues, do everyone a favor and stay home. Well, go anywhere you wish. Just don't go near a polling place. Irresponsible voting is not a responsible thing.
Independent Candidate for Governor of Texas, Kinky Friedman
posted: Nov 8, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
It has become clear that independent candidate Kinky Friedman will not be the next governor of Texas. Dammit! The unique singer/songwriter, novelist and social commentator brought a unique perspective to the sort-of top job in the Lone Star State. Qualifications to be governor? As Kinky often says: "How hard can it be?" He also has a vision for Tejas. "It would be nice for Texas to be No. 1 in something other than toll roads, executions, property taxes and dropouts." His platform is decidedly eclectic. Friedman is fine with prayer in schools. And he wants to legalize casino gambling to pay for education - he calls it the "Slots for tots" program. Finally, he smokes good cigars and if you catch him in the right mood at a small concert, he will offer you one. This is especially true if you remind him that "They don't make Jews like Jesus anymore." That's a song he made popular, even in Texas.
President's "interview" with Rush Limbaugh
posted: Nov 8, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Finally! Did you hear or read about the president's "interview" with Rush Limbaugh. For the first time, President Bush quietly acknowledged the obvious. The thing in Iraq is partly about freedom. It is also about freedom under a friendly government that will allow the United States to be assured of continuing supplies of Iraqi oil. GWB's announcement should be good news for critics and friends. If you're a Bush policy fan, like Limbaugh, you figure the president is taking a stand that's good for America's security and way of life, etc. If you think Bush is an international outlaw who wants to seize oil like an imperialist, you can raise your battle cry. Did anyone notice that this didn't get the attention one might have expected from national media?
Democrat John Kerry's Self-destructive Dumb-speak
posted: Nov 8, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
President Bush "misannounces" words, sometimes garbles whole portions of speeches. The results are regularly humorous, rather than disturbing. However, the president can't hold a candle to Democrat John Kerry when it comes to self-destructive dumb-speak. We will give Kerry the obvious thing: that his latest blabberastic bomb was intended as a joke, that was intended to insult the president. Okay. Fine. What slaps a dunce cap on Kerry's head, again, is the fact that the botches his lines like a drunken vaudevillian when it comes to the big ones. Remember: "I voted for it, before I voted against it!" Now, his latest bad joke comes out as an insult to our troops in Iraq. Talking about Iraq is not akin to "There was a young girl from Nantucket ..." Someone should just tell him the obvious: that he has no future on the stage! The only joke that was evident in John Kerry's latest episode was John Kerry.
Interesting Developments in the Study of Aging
posted: Nov 8, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Two interesting developments in the study of aging. Scientists have found that a thing called “calorie restriction” extends the life of monkeys. The longer-lived critters received about 30 percent fewer calories than normal, but still received adequate amounts of vitamins, minerals and other nutrients. Scientists say that, with the exception of manipulating genes, calorie restriction is the only program known to extend life in a variety of animal species. Got that? Now, another new study made public today was reported this way: Researchers at the Harvard Medical School and the National Institute of Aging report that a natural substance found in red wine, known as resveratrol, offsets the bad effects of a high-calorie diet in mice and significantly extends their lifespan. The obvious, pressing and much-awaited verdict: Will several glasses of red wine balance a diet sufficiently to safely allow the consumption of biscuits and gravy? If so, what would be the appropriate wine-to-gravy ratio? Might cabernet or bordeaux have better life-extending value than, say, an adequate port, or a lighter chianti, or a Chateauneuf-du-Pape? Must the healthful influence of some specific wine be measured against bacon gravy, versus sausage gravy? These questions are clearly more important than federal funding for research on whether arachnids prefer mating in webs established in chandeliers, or those on your bedpost. We have faith that answers to these potentially life-enhancing questions will likely be forthcoming from some probably young, probably very bright, young medical practitioner.
Petty. Silly. Juvenile
posted: Nov 8, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Petty. Silly. Juvenile. Those are good descriptions for the nonsensical stuff involving a couple of forgettable books written by a couple of people in politics. One pedestrian effort is the product of a Democrat running for the U.S. Senate in Virginia. The other mediocrity was written by the wife of the incumbent, Republican vice president. In the spirit of nitwits who would criminalize the works of Henry Miller, cut movie scenes that show boobies, and regard the Song of Solomon as smut, both authors are being criticized for penning fiction describing or otherwise suggestive of (gulp, gasp, blush) sexual acts! Thank goodness neither of them had the talent to write, say, Lady Chatterley’s Lover. It would have been the biggest American scandal since … since … Pat Robertson revealed that Tinky Winky and SpongeBob SquarePants were seen together last year at a Mark Foley fundraiser! Lots of other countries might dislike the United States for good or foolish reasons, but they have to admit we’re always good for a laugh.
Schwarzenegger Jumps on Broadband Bandwagon
posted: Oct 30, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger is jumping on the broadband bandwagon. Nebraska Democratic candidate for governor David Hahn (the publisher of StatePaper.com) has been hollering since last December on how much Nebraska needs to be served by thorough Internet access. The latest news from California has Hahn pointing to Republican Schwarzenegger on the campaign trail and saying: "Some Republicans get it. They just aren't around here!" Governor Dave Heineman isn't showing signs of worry about sticking around the Statehouse. His latest approval rating is somewhere near 70 percent.
Extending the Baseball Season for Monetary Reasons
posted: Oct 30, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Sitting in a winter coat at Wrigley Field in Chicago on opening day is understandable. It's spring, and America's greatest ballpark is right there on the lake. Sitting in a winter coat and hoping that rain won't turn to snow and sleet during the World Series, anywhere, is just silly. If baseball keeps finding monetary reasons to extend the season, the October classic could easily become the November nonsense. Imagine the public address system blaring: "During tonight's weather delay, the crowd will be entertained with one full period of hockey, provided by the teams that represent these two great cities, right out there in center field!"
Rush Limbaugh's Attack on Michael J. Fox
posted: Oct 30, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
It is unlikely that Rush Limbaugh has a sense of shame. That's too bad, because he has good use for one these days. A cold-blooded liar with a history of criminal drug abuse, Limbaugh also has a following that would be the envy of a bell cow. He most recently disgraced himself with an attack on Michael J. Fox, the actor who suffers from Parkinsons disease and endorses the need for stem-cell research. Like the people of our acquaintance who suffer from this disease, Fox sometimes has less control over his body's shaking than at others. After being miffed by a campaign ad done by a Fox for a stem-cell research proponent, Limbaugh said it was obvious that Fox had not taken his medicine, or was exaggerating the twitching that is symptomatic of his disease. Even by the standards of a drug-sucking hypocrite like Limbaugh, it was a venal, mean-spirited and hateful bit of entertainment. No doubt Boobus Americanus is cheering their vulgarian hero today. But we'll tell you this: Whatever drugs Michael J. Fox has in his pocket, he obtained them legally, and he needs them for reasons other than feeling good. Of course, if you were Rush Limbaugh and you did have a conscience, you would probably want to get stoned before you looked in a mirror, too.
We Told 'Em So
posted: Oct 30, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
It doesn't bother most of us to remind others when we told 'em so. It certainly isn't a problem in this corner. For all the blabberastic hot air from Washington about a plan, any plan, addressing "illegals" in this country, what has Congress done? How about the coming crisis in Social Security funding? What about those national debt and trade deficit things? Were it not for some GOP scandals involving sex and bribery, you would be getting nothing but the same old, same old: Abortion and gay marriage. Along with the "If yew ask questions 'bout forn pahlcy, yew are a unpatriotic Amercun." Do you think we are no longer a "stay the course" icon because Dick Cheney realized the insurgents are a long way from their "last throes," since they haven't come near the "last throws" of grenades?
Interview with the President
posted: Oct 23, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Following is a portion of an interview with the president. No editing. It speaks for itself.
STEPHANOPOULOS: "Exactly what I wanted to ask you about, because James Baker said that he's looking for something between cut and run…"
PRESIDENT BUSH: "Cut and run and ..."
STEPHANOPOULOS: "… and stay the course."
PRESIDENT BUSH: "Well, listen, we've never been stay the course, George. We have been — we will complete the mission, we will do our job and help achieve the goal, but we're constantly adjusting the tactics, constantly."
Question: So, who WAS that who uttered "stay the course" in one way or another, over the past several years? This could be a job for Ken Starr.
Mother-love Thing
posted: Oct 23, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
There is nothing more touching than watching the mother-love thing as it is happening. For example, whether human or equine, it seems that mama is ever-so-patient when feeding and nurturing in the days immediately after baby arrives. It's touching. As days and weeks turn into months, it remains touching. It's just that, sometimes, mama's touching begins to reflect less patience when mealtime comes around; and nurturing is more in the direction of "this is how we get ready for the real world, kiddo!"
The Great Divide
posted: Oct 19, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
It has been said that a tremendous sense of being alive is to be had watching Spring hit the Great Divide. It's true. We were also reminded recently that a tremendous sense of mortality is to be had by watching a snow storm hit the Great Divide when you are trying to cross it in a vehicle that seems no bigger than a semi's front tire - the one with the serial number GFH60129 ....
Emails Sent by the Sickoid Former Congressman
posted: Oct 19, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
What used to pass for the good ol' ruff n' tumble of political discourse never bothered us much - at least, not very often. The latest stuff we ran across is, however, too much. If you are a real issues and news junkie, you have seen the nasty emails sent by the sickoid former congressman to some congressional pages. The leaders of this fellow's own party acknowledge what happened, and the contents of his messages. Now, it has been suggested that the messages might somehow have been tampered with - perhaps for the purpose of making them seem worse (at least, that's our guess.) That isn't even bovine excreta. It's crap.
China Drafts Law To Empower Unions and End Labor Abuse
posted: Oct 16, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
The headline said: “China Drafts Law To Empower Unions and End Labor Abuse.”
Then: “American and other foreign corporations have hinted that they may build fewer factories in China if the law is adopted.”
Gosh. It must be scary for corporate elites wallowing in record profits thanks to tax breaks, stagnating or falling American wages, and outsourcing jobs to foreign sweatshops. After starting Americans on the road to peasantry, bosses face uppity Chinese who want some consideration that workers in the USA are told to do without – for the sake of whopping profits.
Upside? Perhaps some Chinese sweatshop jobs will eventually be outsourced to America. And politicians will boast of “thousands of new jobs, thanks to our excellent economic development policy!”
(Breaking news: America’s trade deficit hit a record-high in August – eclipsing the previous record which was set in July.)
http://ne.statepaper.com
Sad Juxtaposition in Nebraska News
posted: Oct 16, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
A sad juxtaposition in today's Nebraska news. Parents in McCook show up at a meeting to express concern about the reading program used in their kids' school. A parent convicted of murder in Omaha just hopes to attend the funeral for his son - who was just murdered.
http://ne.statepaper.com
Military Option Popular for Nebraska Youth
posted: Oct 11, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
In states where young people are often hard-pressed to find jobs worth having - including Nebraska - the military option is often popular - or at least practical. If the latest official Army assessment of the situation in Iraq is on target, Uncle Sam will continue to offer opportunities of various kinds for awhile. The latest estimate: That troops will be needed over there through 2010, at least.
North Korea
posted: Oct 11, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
The issue isn't so much that North Korea is en route to the nuclear club. The issue is that North Korea is en route to the nuclear club with a maniac at the helm.
State Trooper Fired for Membership in a KKK Organization
posted: Oct 11, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Something to think about in the case of the state trooper who was fired for membership in a KKK organization. The troopers' contract with the State of Nebraska provides for binding arbitration in such firings. "Binding" means that both parties agree that, rather than prolonged court proceedings, the decision by an arbitrator will be final. It is not surprising that neither the Patrol nor the attorney general are happy about the outcome of the arbitration. Attorney General Jon Bruning says that, for several good legal reasons, the courts should agree to toss out the arbitration. The courts will decide the issue. If the arbitrator's decision is tossed by the judiciary (and this doesn't involve whether you liked or disliked the decision) it will raise a variety of questions. Labor and management would know that "binding" doesn't always have to mean "binding." All should hope that any decision by the courts will be exquisite in its clarity, leaving little or no doubt about the standard for appeals - if such exist - from rulings in cases where "binding arbitration" has occurred.
Representative Hastert
posted: Oct 11, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Representative Hastert, the not-very-gifted Speaker of the House, should receive the Dim Bulb Award given to the dizziest member of Congress each year. You know the story about the former representative from Florida who sent exceedingly vile, sexually explicit notes to teen-age Pages, got caught and then resigned. The miscreant happened to be a Republican. Can you guess what assininity (preferred spelling) Hastert came up with? He alleged all the furor and righteous fallout over this disgrace reflected a plot by – why are you not surprised? – Democrats and that old standby, the liberal media! Never mind the disclosures by Republican aides who said the case was taken to Hastert years ago. Never mind the obvious comparison Hastert accidentally drew to President Clinton’s immature indiscretion with a woman who was, at least, a consenting adult. Who spent tens of millions on that disgrace to the Republic? And wasn’t it the liberal media who carried stories about it day, after day, after day, for a few years? Former Congressman Foley qualified as an Internet predator that preyed on children. It was only coincidental that he was a Republican. Imagine the altogether different tune Hastert would be whistling if Foley were a Democrat. Hastert has made a fool of himself, done a disservice to his party, and provided America with an example of what’s wrong in politics today.
Kleine and Dornan Candidates for Douglas County Attorney
posted: Oct 11, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
There is a guy named Kleine and a guy named Dornan and they are candidates for the job of Douglas County Attorney. In case you don't follow government, the county attorney is a prosecutor. At this point, be reminded that catering to the meanest and least knowledgeable of the electorate is an American political tradition. Take, for example, politicians who seem to suggest those accused of heinous and repulsive crimes ought not have the legal representation guaranteed to all Americans by the Constitution. Those politicians are jerks - sort of like Kleine and Dornan appear to be. They are lawyers. Each is criticizing the other for representing, in private practice, people accused or convicted of sex crimes. Each says his professional service was appropriate, but seems to suggest that the other guy's work reflected sympathy for evil doers. It's disgusting. Both were properly hired to represent a client, or clients, who were entitled to representation - whether to bring a civil case or fight a criminal charge. It appears Kleine and Dornan are criticizing one another for doing what attorneys swear they will do - vigorously represent the people they agree to help. Dedicated attorneys, regardless of sides, are essential to foundation of the Republic. That lawyers represent people w***e wrong, guilty of awful crimes or of having bad breath is not a bad thing - it is among the best things inherent in American government. So far, anyway. That men such as Kleine and Dornan would feign ignorance (we hope they're feigning it, anyway) of so important a principle is disgusting. That they would suggest there is something wrong with it - directly or indirectly - ought to disqualify either from being a county attorney.
Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke
posted: Oct 5, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke is saying that unless something is done soon, Social Security and Medicare will be in danger, along with the entire federal budget and the national economy. Gosh, Bullwinkle! Do you think Mr. Bernanke might have been read one of those books by former Nebraskan Peter G. Pederson, a master financier and Treasury Secretary in the Nixon administration? Peterson has for years warned of generational warfare, an impossible tax burden and the need for "means testing" for benefits - among other things - to avoid a disaster. Like Warren Buffet and others who do not cower in the political winds, Peterson long ago said that the billions of dollars in tax reductions for the wealthiest of Americans would ultimately do more harm than good, at a time when the nation already faced an impending fiscal disaster. Our guess: These budget calamities will hit America like Katrina hit New Orleans. Grab onto your own life preserver, or grab your ankles.
Former Republican Congressman Mark Foley
posted: Oct 5, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Bad luck for former Republican congressman Mark Foley. His devotion to salacious online-sex with young boys comes to light at a bad time for high-ranking hypocrites and celebrities. Public people have for years employed a kind of magic word, a two-syllable talisman intended to turn down the heat. A formerly self-proclaimed protector of kiddies who use the Internet, Foley was no sooner caught than he invoked the hypocrites' magic word: "REE-hab! REE-hab! I'm gonna' get into REE-hab!" In fact: We wish Foley the very, very best in whatever sincere steps he takes to deal with behaviors that brought him to grief. Unfortunately, the prominent and the privileged have come to make treatment appear as an escape hatch from bad publicity, rather than a door to better things. There is a sense that the public is justifiably tired of it. When Congressman Kennedy wrecked his car? "REE-hab!" When Mel whatzit did his drunken, racist rant? "REE-hab!" It creates a sense that the person involved didn't "see the light" in terms of change - they just saw the spotlight s***ning on them, caught in the act.
Serving Uncle Sam
posted: Oct 5, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
A friend told us this one, about another friend who wishes to remain anonymous: The guy is, right now, in the military. Glad to serve the country. However, not unlike millions of others who have served Uncle Sam, he has a lot of gripes. Actually, he has an endless series of them. Glad to serve ... but really, really, really ready for his enlistment to be up. Then, with all of those gripes on record, he recently signed up again. "I thought you didn't like the service?" "Not like it? I hate it. It drives me crazy." Un-huh. So, why did you re-enlist? "The recruiter came to see me, and he made it sound so darn good I couldn't help myself!" True. Absolutely true.
Attorney General Alberto Gonzales
posted: Oct 5, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Like most of his predecessors, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales goes forth these days to scold the federal judiciary for acting as though it were ... the federal judiciary. Gonzales said today: "A proper sense of judicial humility requires judges to keep in mind the institutional limitations of the judiciary and the duties expressly assigned by the Constitution to the more politically accountable branches." Hmmmmm. And didn't we read something in a history book about the independent judiciary being assigned to "judge" cases involving the legislative and executive branches? The idea being that the latter often act under political pressure from constituents - while the judiciary's only constituent is supposed to be the Constitution of the United States. The notion that the judiciary is obligated to bow - especially to those who bow to political winds - is not a good one. One more thought: Our personal memory goes back to the Eisenhower administration. We are hard pressed to think of an instance where any presidential administration had room to lecture anyone about a sense of institutional humility.
Full Report on the War Released
posted: Oct 5, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
The release of the full report on the war and the nation's security - as it relates to terrorism - is a good thing. We don't understand why the White House released only parts of the thing, after the full report had already reached the public domain. Regardless - critics cite frightening disclosures among the conclusions reached by the administration's top intelligence agencies. Supporters cite positives that can be read into the report. We suggest that Americans who take time to read about the issue should concentrate initially on those portions of the study which conclude that America is less safe than before 9/11 - and that the ranks of terrorists have grown. Why? Because they are important, and because it will give both sides a chance to analyze for themselves the discussion of these topics. Those too lazy to read can simply hit the Internet with screaming piffle about how anyone who questions anything is not patriotic - just like the Islamic terrorists do it.
Andrew Fastow Sentenced to Six Years in Prison
posted: Sep 26, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
U.S. District Judge Kenneth Hoyt is a dope. Earlier today, he sentenced Andrew Fastow to a measly six years in prison. Fastow was the guy who came up with schemes to hide Enron Corporation’s debt while exaggerating profits. Fastow himself previously agreed to serve a maximum ten years when he made a deal with prosecutors. Remember, this was the guy whose handiwork contributed to the loss of more than $2 billion in pension funds that hurt thousands of working-class people. That is on top of the other slimy stuff he participated in, which cost all manner of folk billions and billions of dollars. Prosecutors, civil attorneys and the judge properly noted that Fastow played a central role in aiding the prosecution of Enron higher-ups, including the late Ken Lay. Fastow certainly deserved real consideration for doing what was right, whilst endeavoring to save his skin. The thing is, the Fastow sentence certainly promotes disrespect for the law, and it diminishes the severity of his crime. A lot of employees and investors suffered financial ruin that won’t go away in six years. And a lot of men and women are doing a lot more than six years in the slam for nonviolent crimes that were piddling in comparison.
Venezuela Sitting on Enormous Oil Reserve
posted: Sep 25, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
This guy from Venezuela says some kookie stuff - but his country is also sitting on an enormous oil - albeit hard to get - oil reserve. It might be the world's biggest, in fact. We highly recommend that you Google Hugo Chavez. Neither Nebraskans nor anyone should laugh about what this fellow could mean to the international economy. When you think of fuel for agriculture, think of Hugo.
Friends can be Wonderful
posted: Sep 22, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Friends can be wonderful. Take Rue, for example. We closed the NewsUpdate column the other day with a reference to Guinness. A few minutes later ... "Speaking of Guinness. It does taste better in Ireland. Neighbor here suggests that in America you pour it quickly from one glass to another about 3 or 4 times. And damned if he isn't right. Mellows up a bit, and still cascades."
The column also referenced autumn, which brought yet another thought, this one from Dr. Scott Rasmussen: "I just wanted to remind you that even though the weather has been cold and rainy, your coronary arteries will thank you if you stay away from the biscuits and gravy ..."
What to do? Sit in the corner drinking thrice-poured Guinness, and dream about biscuits and gravy!
http://ne.statepaper.com
Fall day. Mare loaded quietly
posted: Sep 21, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Fall day. Mare loaded quietly. Filly of four months follows into trailer. Seven hours of highway trailer miles. One way. No problem. Strange stalls. Strange noise. Strange equine neighbors. Big crowd. No problem. Mare scores waaaaay up there. Next day. Back to Nebraska. More trailer hours. No problem. Home without incident. Happy critters. Foal enters corral. Rolls joyously, clangs into fence, rips herself a gawd-awful cut on the cannon bone. Mare waits in stall. Decides to roll. Gets stuck in a corner. Flailing. Screaming. Foal has fits. Mare
gets free. Whew! Vet comes. Leaves bill. No problem. Later: Gelding wanders up to stall. Stares at mare. Stands in front of old buckaroo. Mare whinnies. Bites gelding. Old buckaroo much annoyed. Hollers at gelding. "GET BACK!" Gelding obeys. Old buckaroo recovering. Horses fine. "Guinness - It's good for you!"
http://ne.statepaper.com
Reinstituting a Draft
posted: Sep 21, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
The extraordinarily naive, the truly innocent and some charter members of the Cinderella Lives! movement have been talking via the Internet of late about the military draft. They banter - from various points on the political line running right to left - over whether some variety of conscription would be a good thing. There is every indication that most participants in these seemingly sincere discussions were mostly born after the Vietnam conflict - which could also be remembered as the military conflict to end all military conscription. The fact is that Americans would not stand for reinstituting a draft. Period. See it for good or bad. The nation might jolly well roar for war against whatever countries draw the ire of Dick Cheney and the Fox News folk, they might even cheer for the invasion of domestic studios where the likes of Obermann, Stewart and Colbert carry on in the tradition of Mencken, Twain and Swift. No matter how the masses might rally for roughing up the opposition - at home or abroad - they will rally a lot faster against any notion that their flesh and blood be required to forfeit a few years of young life, or life itself, to march to the tune of rattling sabers, no matter which party's administration is beating the drum.
Candidate with a conscience
posted: Sep 21, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
We tip our hat in the direction of Iowa and a candidate for that state's Legislature. The guy left the Republican Party the other day because of a vicious attack the GOP made on his rival. The candidate with a conscience said he would continue running an already uphill campaign as an independent, but that he didn't want the GOP imprimatur on his effort. More things like this should happen, more often, throughout politics.
Austrians Propensity to be Tidy
posted: Sep 19, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Austrians have long been known for their propensity to be tidy. The city of Vienna recently combined that trait with citizen participation in government. The fond-of-neatness citizenry has been asked to help conduct something of a survey. The people are being asked to count dog poop. That is to day, the city wants citizens to count the number of doggie messes they see during a five minute period. No one suggests that the city has gone to the dogs, but there are those who think that the dogs have gone on the city too much.
Hot Coffee
posted: Sep 19, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
The odds of an otherwise inattentive waiter filling your cup with extremely hot coffee increase in proportion to the amount of time you spend looking over your shoulder, rather than at your cup. The odds that you will then sip from that cup ...
Pope Quoting Ancient Byzatine Emperor
posted: Sep 16, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
We find one form of politically correct silliness as offensive as another. The Pope gave a speech in Germany the other day. He wanted to convey that violence ought not have a place in spreading religious faith. The pontiff was correct, and it's too bad a great many of his predecessors didn't see things that way. The Pope is catching hell, so to speak, from some in the Muslim world. During his speech - being careful to emphasize that he was quoting an ancient emperor of the Byzatine Empire - the Pope noted the emperor's criticism of Muhammad. The emperor criticized the prophet for various things, "such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." Putting it very mildly, we have our personal admiration for the current pontiff well under control. However, his quoting some ancient for the purpose of historical perspective ought not be an excuse for comparing him to Mussolini and, that old standby, Hitler. A closed mind is the paradise of prejudice, and the first haven for the hateful and ignorant.
Former Texas Governor Ann Richards
posted: Sep 16, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Former Texas Governor Ann Richards died last evening. Her passing was a loss to the Democratic Party, the Lonestar State and American politics. She was a political veteran of the old school. She was rough and ready in the political arena, but she never stooped to the disgusting tactics that are the hallmark of today's campaigning and day-to-day political ugliness. She had a sense of humor and a sense of duty. We will always remember her asking why Fred Astaire got top billing over Ginger Rogers. Richards noted that "Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, and she did it going backwards in high heels!"
November ballot
posted: Sep 16, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
In just a couple of days Secretary of State John Gale will have to certify which candidates and which issues will appear on the November ballot. The court fights over initiative and referendum proposals have become an integral part of the petition process - the first right reserved to the people by the Nebraska Constitution. Unfortunately, "outside money" has also become central to the process - something to be regretted in many instances - but there is nothing to be done about it. The U.S. Supreme Court has said money is often part of the free speech guaranteed by the First Amendment. And that's that.
911
posted: Sep 16, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Our best thoughts are with all the victims of the 911 attacks - alive and dead. We also have to say that those who continue to exploit the events of that tragic day deserve to be held in low regard - now and always.
Second Governor Debate in McCook
posted: Sep 8, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Reliable sources tell us that the second debate between Governor Dave Heineman and Democrat David Hahn has been called off. Unofficial word is that one of the panelists scheduled to participate in the debate in McCook will not be able to attend. Obviously that is no legitimate reason to cancel a debate. There is bound to at least one other newsperson in Nebraska - including southwest Nebraska - who would be willing to fill in. If the McCook debate falls through, we're sure that both Hahn and Heineman will scramble to make sure another is scheduled real quick, so that voters get the three debates they were promised. Right, boys? Right?
http://ne.StatePaper.com
Katie Couric's Debut
posted: Sep 7, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Katie Couric made her debut as the anchor on a network evening news show. A question: SO WHAT? The way the media has gone off on this non story, you would think that Anne Coulter was going to have a child by Steve Colbert. The anchor on a news program (better referred to these days as a "show") reads a comparatively few lines and then says "take it away" to someone in the field. Other than that they are overpaid by millions of dollars annually, what's the big deal? Credibility is not measured these days by the confidence a news anchor generates with viewers. In fact, we doubt that credibility is high on the list of network anchor qualifications. Looks, charisma, star quality and whatever else are overwhelmingly important. In fact, we suspect that those things are central to whatever "credibiity" measurement is currently employed.
Representative Katherine Harris
posted: Sep 6, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
All manner of critics from the left and the center and the right took their shots at Representative Katherine Harris a***he sought the Republican Senate nomination in Florida. Lots of pundits said she was obviously just ... goofy. She made some campaign statements that turned a lot of heads in disapproval. And her campaign organization was little more than a joke. Well, the last word belongs to the voters. The voters in the GOP Florida primary have nominated Harris for the Senate job. It goes to show you ... whatever it shows you.
Mother Nature
posted: Sep 6, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Mother Nature loves the mourning dove. Certainly she loves those who inhabit Nebraska. What have we had? Drought and heat. Drought and heat. Heat and heat. And heat. The dove season opens. Cooler if not just a tad cold at night. Doves fly south.
Holiday Weekend
posted: Sep 1, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Holiday weekend. Remember that life is mostly attitude and timing. If things aren't going well for you when you're trying to make time on the road this weekend, don't be a jerk. Think about whether a trip will be more trouble than it's worth. Home ain't so bad, and you don't have trouble finding a parking space. And, if the kids get on your nerves when you're on the road, leave 'em at home. They probably don't enjoy your highway company any more than you enjoy them. Besides, if you'd done a better job parenting, they probably wouldn't be a pain in the butt, anyway.
Proposed Ballot Issues
posted: Sep 1, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Have you been following the "this and that" of various fights over which of the proposed ballot issues can, in fact, be on the November ballot? We suspect that most voters tuned out the noise a***ociated with these things some time ago. How many have simply accepted that we will check out the voting possibilities when we go to the voting place? Of course, there is also the not-unlikely possibility that a great many of us have always done exactly that.
Bringing Karr to the States for DNA Testing
posted: Aug 30, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Does it not seem incongruous to disparage the prosecutor in Boulder, Colorado? The guy who looks like he has giblets for brains confessed to killing JonBenet Ramsey. He was extraordinarily familiar with details of the case. Coincidentally, he happened to be in Thailand. The prosecutor was right to have him brought to the United States. Think of the criticism had she not hauled him to Colorado for DNA tests and interrogation – such as: How could a prosecutor rely on DNA tests by a foreign government halfway around the world? Then, there would be the conspiracy theories: The overseas tests were a plot to protect someone; this Karr fellow wasn’t brought to the U.S. because there were witnesses who could positively identify him in person; authorities were paid off by JonBenet’s father to keep him overseas; and, undoubtedly, Karr was the last person who could link Castro to the Kennedy a***assination … except maybe for O.J., whose acquittal was arranged by the CIA. The prosecutor in Boulder did the right thing. Certainly it was what Nebraskans would have expected, given their consistent demand for disclosure in important, controversial law enforcement activity of any sort.
Comment from Representative Katherine Harris of Florida
posted: Aug 30, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Representative Katherine Harris of Florida was recently interviewed by a Baptist publication in that state. Among her comments: "If you're not electing Christians, then in essence you are going to legislate sin.” That’s what she said. We forego the temptation to comment. We are just going to leave it there. Right where it hit the ground and splattered.
Nebraska Governor Debate
posted: Aug 28, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Favorite quote from the debate among the three guys who want to be Nebraska's next governor came from the Nebraska Party candidate. No politician has better summarized a portion of the state's unwritten political mantra: "God bless meat!"
http://ne.statepaper.com
Morning After Pill
posted: Aug 24, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
The Food and Drug Administration has just approved over-the-counter sale of the "morning after pill" to women 18 and older. What part of the rightwing do you suppose will fall on the west wing first and loudest? Will this become yet another decades-long fount of hell-fire n' brimstone ranting in state legislatures? Count on this: If it happens, it will happen in Nebraska.
Promo for a News Item today
posted: Aug 23, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
We saw a promo for a news item today and immediately concluded it reflected unarguable wisdom: "Screw April - August is the cruelest month!" T.S. Eliot was a great poet, almost as great as he perceived himself to be, but he decidedly underestimated August.
Q. and A. President Bush had with a Reporter Monday
posted: Aug 22, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Find a story or two for yourself on the Internet concerning the Q. and A. President Bush had with a reporter Monday.
Reporter: What did Iraq have to do with 911?
President Bush: "Nothing."
Now, will someone tell Dick Cheney?
The Drought
posted: Aug 21, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
This drought has reached proportions previously unknown around our place. We had a pond. It was fed by rain, snow, etc. We no longer have a pond. It had been dry once or twice over the years. Now, it is not dry. It will not be a pond. It is overgrown with vegetation. Not bad looking, so long as you are into nature's natural look. The other day a blue heron walked around the edge of the sprouting greenery, looking as though it were thinking: "I'm getting old, but not all that old. I know I did some fishing here a couple months ago. I just know it ...."
China's Enormous Increases in Military Spending
posted: Aug 18, 2006 | comments: 1 | post comment
The United States keeps expressing concern about China's enormous increases in military spending. Someone at the BBC asked China's Ambassador to the United Nations about the American fretting. Ambassador Sha Zukang showed a gift for direct answers - something Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld should work on. Concerning American concern about muscle building in the Chinese military, Sha Zukang said: "It's better for the U.S. to shut up" on that topic. China is mostly a peace-loving place, she said. The U.S. just needs to be quiet because "It's much, much better." Don't be insulted. She could have come back with: "What? America worrying about how China spends money? America should worry about making interest payments on the zillion dollars it borrowed from us."
Feds Tapping Americans' Telephones
posted: Aug 17, 2006 | comments: 1 | post comment
A federal judge in Detroit today said the feds must stop tapping Americans' telephones without acquiring warrants. The Bush administration had argued - publicly and in court - that the program was well within the president's authority, and constitutional. The case will no doubt proceed through federal litigation. Good. That's why America has what is supposed to be an independent, federal judiciary. In matters of such fundamental importance, political considerations are not supposed to have a role in deciding the issue.
American Form of Politics in the Middle East
posted: Aug 17, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
The American form of politics might be catching on a bit in the Middle East. Look at what's reported to be happening in Lebanon. Hezbollah has representatives visiting villages and talking to locals whose homes have been d***aged or destroyed, or whose businesses have suffered the same fate. What is Hezbollah doing? Some of the same things that made ward heelers a legendary element of American politics. The Hezbollah crew is taking names and promising help. The equivalent of: 'Okay, then. Your cart got blown up in the market, and your brother-in-law's house doesn't have a roof on it. Is that the deal? We'll help you with both things, real soon.' 'You say that when the house got bombed, all the kids' clothes were in there? Take it easy. Someone will be around real soon. Keep ducking the bombs and we'll keep trying to keep you eating every day.' It was an American politician who observed: All politics is local. Someone on "the other side" has obviously learned that lesson.
Old Computers Sold at City Auctions
posted: Aug 17, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
It's something to be expected from an outfit with a name like "Bruno's Bargain Car, Truck, Old Tire, Wholesale Cigarette, Bowling Ball and Jewelry Emporium." The City of Omaha has old computers to get rid of, because old computers take up room needed for new ones, and old computers are nasty things with a lot of stuff in them that you don't want dumped in landfills, let alone reaching potable water supplies. Proving that there can be as much initiative in government as the private sector, the city has been foisting old computers onto people buying vehciles "as is" at city auctions. Thus, the problem of old computers is disbursed among individuals caught unawares of the city's mischief. You have to ask yourself: Would you buy a used car from this government?
Drilling ANWR
posted: Aug 14, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
In a debate Friday, Republican Senate hopeful Pete Ricketts said that if the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge were open for drilling, he would "guarantee" that the price of oil and gasoline would decline. In the spirit of our constant effort to be an equal opportunity pain in the a***inine (preferred spelling), we want to make clear we include ALL Republicans, ALL Democrats, ALL conservatives, ALL liberals - and EVERYONE else - when we say: If you think drilling ANWR for oil is a good idea, someone ought to drill your butt for brains!
Stupid Things People Say
posted: Aug 10, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
It is always easy to understand that there will be significant differences of opinion on important policy matters. War, for example, qualifies as one of those. When such a controversial issue raises the passion of so many, it is also understandable that some people will say stupid things. Impugning the patriotism of the other side is boilerplate rhetoric for the right. Questioning the mental health of the other side is common on the left. We heard one argument the other day, though, that really got our attention. Someone pointed out that Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld had initially predicted that the war in Iraq probably wouldn't last six months. An email came to us, saying it was inappropriate and perhaps dangerous to publish such stuff. Why's that? Because, we were told, such talk would remind insurgents that the U.S. thought the war wouldn't last this long. Interesting that insurgents would remember such stuff, when sooooo many Americans do not.
Millions Wasted Over the Years on State Computer Program Catastrophes
posted: Aug 10, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
We're going to forego personal observations in today's column, and ask you to read the lead story in today's StatePaper.com concerning millions wasted over the years on state computer program catastrophes. We hope you will comment. A lot.
Millions Wasted On Computer Systems Debacles Demand State Scrutiny
http://nebraska.st...8/09/44da3c9a92f7c
Kearney Archway Burden on Taxpayers
posted: Aug 10, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
We have nothing but good wishes for the good people who want to save and maintain the monument that spans I-80 near Kearney, honoring those who traveled the Great Platte River Road. That said, "the arch" should never, ever, under any circumstances become a burden on Nebraska taxpayers. When the thing was built in such a way as to require people to drive past it, before they could drive to it, we knew there was going to be trouble. This was a local venture that drew investors hopeful of a good outcome. It's unfortunate the outcome has not been good - but it is not the fault of taxpayers and it never should become their burden.
Rainy Day and Monday
posted: Aug 10, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
The attitude about Monday in this corner is steadfast. However, it is interesting to note that while Monday and "a rainy day" often have negative connotations, the fact that it is raining around and about much of Nebraska is the best news that has been delivered with any Monday in a long time.
Time Flies
posted: Aug 10, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
It's true that time flies when you're having fun. Have you ever noticed that time flies even faster when on a Friday when you're busier than a small horse standing at a tall feeder?
Kansas Board of Education
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Well, hoo-ray for Kansas. Voters have decided that the state board of education - which for years has been a blessing to late-night comedians - should acknowledge the 20th Century. The board is now a***ured of a majority that will change policies on sex education and critical attacks on evolution. Both topics are worthy of debate, but the Kansas board seemed to view them through the eyes of jurors who heard the Scopes trial.
Mother Breast-feeding Infant on Cover of Babytalk Magazine
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
This is not a joke. Some folks around the country, lots of them in fact, have raised a commotion because of a recent cover on Babytalk magazine. This is not a publication you will find at the barbershop, on the counter at a local cafe or in the adult magazine section in a truck stop. Babytalk is published for expectant mothers. Advice and anecdotes and such. It didn't seem unreasonable (it says here) when its cover showed a photo of a mother, breast-feeding an infant. That's what all the fuss is about - a magazine for mothers with a cover depicting a baby, breast-feeding. One complainer from Texas reportedly argued that if it is a breast, it's sexual, and that's that. You know what that argument reaally is? Dumb and ugly, and that's that. Hmmmm. Following the Texas lady's logic, might breast-feeding moms be charged with child sexual abuse? Even in Texas?
Mel Gibson
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Mel Gibson doesn't need forgiveness. He needs psychotherapy, followed by intensive tutoring on the history of the world. The poor soul probably believes that all Jews have a sack of gold stashed somewhere, that all black people are s***ftless – probably because they eat too much soul food – that everyone with Irish blood is always drunk, and that Mad Max was based on the real-life adventures of Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Americans Without Health Insurance
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Thousands and thousands (and thousands) of Nebraskans are among the millions and millions (and millions) of Americans who do not have health insurance. Senator John Kerry, whose road to the White House took on the dreariest aspects of the lost highway, planned to introduce a measure today requiring that all Americans have health insurance within six years. The future of this issue is easily analyzed. If the millions without insurance are somehow rallied - by a political campaign and/or self interest - their real or perceived votes will move Congress towards the Kerry idea, or something like it. If they don't become a political force, what will happen? Well, it is as John Prine said. "A question ain't really a question, if you know the answer too."
What To Do About the Millions of People Who Enter the United States Illegall
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
Members of the House of Representatives will soon begin to conduct political duck-and-cover hearings around the country concerning what to do about the millions of people who enter the United States illegally. Every news story about these hearings should include some boilerplate language. Maybe: "The House scheduled the hearings in lieu of debate - let alone action - on the politially sensitive election-year issue. The hearings provide a stump for spouting campaign rhetoric, without the risk a***ociated with actually taking a position." Whatever the specifics of such a disclaimer, consumers of news should be reminded that these sham hearings were rolled out specifically to camouflage
Tour de France Winner
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
The American cyclist who won the Tour de France flunked a post-race drug test. You have to wonder: Given the sophistication of techniques used to test for some drugs, why would competitors at that level risk it? International sports organizations generally take hardcore attitudes toward such stuff. Anyone who wants to use performance-enhancing drugs should not compete on the international stage. They belong in professional baseball.
Truth About Horses
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
We want to believe that the following observation had mostly to do with hard-noggin critters who worked tough jobs, in tough country. Regardless, someone asked us to find it and publish it. So ...
"The truth is that horses exhibit, in an exaggerated form, many of the worst characteristics of people. They are greedy, envious, spiteful, malicious, slothful, superstitious, and stupid. They are congenital hysterics and each one is, ominously, a prospective homicide. If horses could talk, they would lie!"
- Owen Ulph, (old time cowboy) from his book, The Fiddleback: Lore of the Line Camp.
"HeadOn! Apply directly to the forehead!"
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
"HeadOn! Apply directly to the forehead!" If you have seen and heard the commercial that bellows the above phrase several times, you most certainly find it obnoxious. If not, you probably think canned spaghetti is elegant finger food. However, we must recognize the genius behind the advertisement. It turns out that "HeadOn! Apply directly to the forehead!" is touting some sort of purported headache remedy called HeadOn. (It is applied directly to the forehead.) The genius in the ad lies in the fact that, far more than others, it gives you a reason to consider giving it a try. A Pepsi ad might not make you thirsty. A Coke ad might not make you ... whatever. But a "HeadOn! Apply directly to the forehead!" advertisement has a very real chance of giving you a headache.
Strawberries
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
It would be a happier world if strawberries were in season all year. Same thing with peaches.
Embryonic Research
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
President Bush issued a promised veto on a bill involving embryonic research. He noted the number of today's children whose lives began as frozen embryos. Those lives represent a process that had its beginnings ... in embryonic research.
Property Tax Complaining Among Homeowners
posted: Aug 4, 2006 | comments: 0 | post comment
In reading Nebraska newspapers we find a consistent